Our Anniversary Trip to Roanoke, VA!

When Ben and I got engaged we spent the weekend calling all of our long-distance family to poll which weekend of 6 would be most convenient for everyone to come to town for our sealing and reception. One after another they all gave the same reply- the first weekend possible; which happened to be over Easter. Everyone flew or drove in on Thursday, we were married on Good Friday, and spent the weekend celebrating.

It has worked out so well that our anniversary now falls around a holiday weekend every year! Ben gets Good Friday off of work, so we love considering where we should go to celebrate :D This year we used the extra time to go to Roanoke, VA. We couldn't decide between a mountain or beach vacation (we love living close enough to so many beautiful areas that anything is an option!), but quickly settled on Roanonke- a city nestled in the Appalachian Mountains only 2 hours away- after seeing that one of favorite (and clean) comedians, Jim Gaffigan, was scheduled to have a show there on Saturday, March 30. Ben did some extra research and discovered some really terrific activities Roanoke has to offer. We spent the weekend hiking 2.5 miles to the top of a mountain and sinking hundreds of feet below the Earth into a cavern, seeing one of the most wonderful comedians in the country and one of the 7 natural wonders of the world.

Roanoke, VA Natural Bridge

This natural bridge was formed after a cavern collapsed. Along with Niagara Falls it has been one of the most popular natural tourist destinations in America since the 1700s, and has been included in many Wonders of the World lists. (I had never even heard of it, even growing up a few hours away in SC. But I'm glad I've finally learned more of my nearby history and visited!)

Roanoke, VA. Dixie Caverns

The only caverns in SW Virginia, the Dixie Caverns are nearby the Natural Bridge. The caverns were discovered in 1920 and are now open 363 days for 50-minute tours. The tour takes groups deep into the mountain and from "room" to room of discovered caverns. We go up and down different layers, see stalagtites (from the ceiling), stalagmites (from the ground up), water pools, and bats. 

I, foolishly, didn't set up my camera on a tripod so I didn't get many good pictures, but it was really, really cool! (And only a little cold ;)

Dragon's Tooth Hiking Trail

There are many hikes around the Roanoke area due to it's proximity to the beautiful Appalachian Mountains, but Ben quickly chose Dragon's Tooth as our Saturday activity due to it's name. That was fine with me- you may remember I referred to Whit as "Dragon" before he was born! Portions of this hike were pretty strenuous, though, and, in hindsight, may not have been the best choice... 

It started off as a tame walk gradually uphill...

Then there were a few areas of necessary wall scaling... 

(during which I kept repeating, "Be careful with my baby!")

And the last .7 miles (or so) was almost exclusively scrambling over giant, awkward boulders.  It's been hailed one of the hardest hiking portions of the entire App Mountains! I have breathing trouble due to Tourette's Syndrome, Ben has a cranky knee after years of competitive downhill mountain biking, and we (Ben) was carting around Whit the whole time! If I'd realized this last section had such a tough reputation I might have discouraged the trip! 

The trail is called Dragon's Tooth because there are giant Tuscarora quartzite rock formations that straddle the cliff which resemble giant fangs. After climbing for about 2 hours I sat down with Whit at the base of the cliff while Ben climbed the extra 30 feet to get a view from the top of the "teeth". This is the very top of Cove Mountain!

I was here: 

Changing Whit's diaper, 

and nursing. 

 We left Whit under the watch of some VT student hikers so Ben could guide me up to the top of the rock: 

It was sort of terrifying. 

But beautiful! 

Ben carried Whit in our new Osprey Poco Baby Backpack, which garnered lots of attention! This we heard from passing hikers:

"Wow! Do they make those in my size?"
"He's got the best seat on the mountain!"
"He looks tired from this hike."
"Hey! There's a baby in there!"

"You're a better man than me..."

It's funny how having a baby automatically makes you popular :)

We contacted the Roanoke YSA group on Facebook for a babysitter and found tickets to Jim Gaffigan on Craigslist for the fourth row!! It was INCREDIBLE. We also went to two local restaurants, Wildflour (which is organic, local fare in a unique restaurant covered with paintings done by local artists) and The Quarter (named the best new restaurant of 2011 and designed with New Orleans food. We ate gator! It may have been one of the best meals of my entire life!)

All in all we had a really terrific visit! There is also an impressive-looking modern art museum, a fun downtown square, and the second-largest municipal park in the country so I'd say another trip to Roanoke is in our future! 

All Parents Mess Up.

I'm not oblivious to the fact that every parent has days when they wonder (or know) if they are doing the right thing. I wish that's all today had been- a test of parental faith. But today wasn't an I-don't-think-I'm-doing-my-best-in-this-moment sort of day, it was an I'm-being-told-by-a-children's-professional-that-I've-been-screwing-my-child-up sort of day.

Here's how it all began...

In a time not-too-distant, in a land called Greensboro, a 4-month-old baby boy weighed 14 lbs. 3 oz. Let's call him "Whit." He was estimated to be in the 44% for weight, which came as no surprise to his adoring parents. See, Whit's mom had had many ultrasounds during her pregnancy and many pediatrician appointments since he was born which all tracked Whit along the 50% for weight, as well. In the months that followed, however, Whit seemed to stop gaining weight. He grew longer, his face became thinner, and he began to resemble more of a little boy than a baby as sitting up stretched his neck and teeth sprouted in his smile. Although he seemed to be doing well, his parents became concerned that Whit wasn't gaining any weight. Whit also wasn't advancing toward some developmental milestones, either. Well-meaning family, friends, and strangers would often offer this advice to Whit's parents: "Just wait until he's 8 months. That's when he'll start signing." "Babies don't usually start crawling until 8 months." "His weight has plateaued for now, but in a couple of months he'll be gaining weight again." etc, etc. And so it was that they patiently (for the most part) waited for this mythical 8-month stage when all of their concerns would magically be overcome.

It didn't happen.

I don't need to be told that all babies are unique- I know that- but I couldn't help wondering if Whit's lack of interest in signing, creeping, crawling, pulling up, and standing (all of which, or at least some of which, really ought to be happening right about now) was related to his slight build. Is it possible that he isn't gaining enough weight to build the muscle needed for those actions, or something?

So today I brought him in for a visit to his pediatrician's office just to make sure his physical development isn't stunted. Give me a break- he's my first child and, though I try not to let the stress show to Whit, everything he does/ doesn't do is admittedly over-analyzed. He weighed in at exactly 15 lbs. Even less than I thought.

The conversation went something like this:
Dr. L: "Does he get solid food?"
Me: "He has two meals a day of solid food."
Dr. L: "Why is he only getting two meals?! He should be getting three plus a snack!"
Me: "Well... We were told at 4 months to give him one meal, and at 6 months to give him two meals. I didn't want to do anything new without hearing from his pediatrician first."
Dr. L: "How often does he nurse?"
Me: "Every 2 hours or so. He's been teething the last few weeks, so he's nursing a few extra times at night when he wakes up." 
Dr. L: "Teething has nothing to do with it."
Me: "Oh I know, I just wanted you to know that he's getting even more milk than normal and his weight is still low." 
Dr. L: "Well you're right about that!" (shows me the graph of Whit's weight since birth and how it had plateaued then took a nosedive off the chart.) "How long does he nurse for?"
Me: "About 10 mins." 
Dr. L: "No wonder! He isn't nursing for long enough. You're feeding him too often. He's just snacking. You need to refuse him nursing so he's hungry enough to nurse long enough to get to the hindmilk during each feeding. You need to get him down to nursing just 4 times a day." 
Me: "Ok, that makes sense, but I feed him all he wants until he seems satisfied, then feed him again when he's hungry..." 
Dr. L: "You've been teaching him that when he cries you'll feed him. I would cry all the time if it meant someone would nurse me, too!" (Did I mention Dr. L is a man?) "You'll have to let him throw his tantrums without giving in and feeding him. And you have to be consistent. B. F. Skinner taught us about the link between behavior-consequences-reward." (Yes, he actually tried to tell me who Skinner was). 

Dr. L checked Whit's stomach and his liver and onions kidneys are fine, he was moving his arms and legs around enough that Dr. L isn't concerned with his motor skills, and we were sent on our way with the strict instructions to get that kid on a schedule!

Which basically (and complicatedly... really any way you look at it) boils down to the fact that I, his mother, the being ultimately entrusted with his care, have been facilitating and encouraging Whit's bad behavior of not nursing the right way and not feeding him solid meals often enough and, therefore, am responsible for his low weight.

But how the heck was I supposed to know that?!?!?!?! And Whit is already pretty comfortable erring on the side of discomfort and sadness, which I think I deal with pretty well on a daily basis thankyouverymuch, so who is he to make it sound as simple as letting him cry through a tantrum until he figures out he won't get the reward? Whit isn't being manipulative- this is the way he's acted since birth! And realizing early on that I'd have to be firm with him so he might eventually outgrow his solace and learn to depend on himself to be happy means I don't just automatically coddle him. I Don't!

Ugh! Just.... ugh!

It was such a horrible feeling to go to a pediatrician looking for help and comfort, and instead be met with news that my baby is even worse than I expected and his shortcoming are a direct result of my poor parenting. I love him so much, and I really do try to be good for him.

So after Whit's nap we went to the grocery store and came back with lots of goodies that I'll be giving him all day long now:

When I'm a grandma (hopefully) will I look back on these days and regret doing everything wrong and think I've totally messed up my precious baby?

Whit is 8 months old!

The many faces of Whit:

Whit @ 8 Months:

15.2 lbs

27.5 inches

*Eating food with spices. I make all of Whit's food, and have been trying new combinations with curry, Italian spices, garlic, chili powder, etc. in hopes that he will get used to the types of foods Ben and I eat daily and we can avoid having a picky eater later on!
*Lifts his arms up to be held. This melts my heart. Yay.
*Has 4 teeth and is getting 2 more on top! The last three weeks Whit has been in non-stop-waking-up-every-two-hours-hardly-naps-only-wants-to-be-held teething mode. I can't wait for those little jerks teeth to be out of there! But now he smiles to the left so he can feel the teeth that have come in on top :)
*Crinkles his nose when he smiles. It is so cute to see his smile evolve!
*Separation Anxiety. He cries if the person he's been playing with (usually me or Ben) is out of sight for even a brief moment.
*Is getting better at playing by himself. We can leave him on the floor with a few toys and he will happily be entertained (for a little while, at least!) 
*Still isn't crawling, mostly because he can accomplish whatever he wants by sitting up. He can fold himself in half to lean down and grab things, twist around the get things behind him, and sit back up from laying down after stretching to grab things. If something is too out-of-the-way to be stretched and received, he couldn't care less about it.
*No matter how tired he is when I put him down, he will twist around his crib until he's laid in every direction before finally falling asleep horizontally across his crib. His is a mini crib that is only 26 inches wide, so this is becoming a real problem! It is hilarious.
*Hates to be manipulated (physically, not emotionally.) If we position his knees to a crawling positions, or move his hands to show him how to sign he will FREAK OUT!
*I've heard babies have a short memory, so distractions work wonders when they get upset. Not this child. He knows how to hold a grudge. If I leave the room, stop feeding him, or something else that upsets him he stays angry for a while! He may look like his dad, but this is proof that he gets at least one thing from his mommy!
*Can sit in a highchair and walks in a simple walking toy at home.
*Can stand for a little while and even pick his feet up when holding onto something
*Loves to tilt his head back to look up at us if he is sitting in front of us. He loves getting kissed all over his face when he does that!
*Has started eating table food. We have given him beans, rice, noodles, carrots sticks, and pretzels, which he happily gums to death.

I am so proud to say that with his developing personality it is so obvious how much he loves his parents. He completely lights up with Ben or I are around. He gives huge smiles when we smile at him, laughs when we laugh, always wants to be held, and generally shows how much he adores being around us. Yesterday Ben said, "What is going to happen when he isn't a Momma's Boy anymore?" Me: "Easy. That's never going to happen." 

Which is why I am able to get such cute pictures of this little charmer, even when he is teething, generally miserable, and crying. 

Whit says Happy Friday!

Whit has been really talkative lately, which is a combination of only a couple noises- either he's squaking or grunting! We call him our little pterodactyl :) (Did you know that was spelled with a "p"? Thank you, auto correct!)

We talk back, and he laughs at the sound we mimic. At least he agrees its silly!

I'm so glad I finally got some of his jibber jabber recorded. This was taken after his morning breakfast of yogurt; he's always happiest after he's eaten!

Happy Friday!

Whit is 7 months old!

Whit @ 7 months: 
15.4 lbs

*Blowing raspberries! As if he didn't already drool enough... We keep saying, "Oh, he's teething!" because his shirt will be soaked after a few minutes, but no new teeth come in... Hmmmm...

*Has started to grip around my arm when I pick him up. It feels like he's giving a little hug, which actually makes me excited for him to grow up (a little) and give me a real hug!

*Has included breakfast as a second solid meal! He eats full-fat greek yogurt with fruit puree every morning, and lentils or other protein a veggies at night. We are trying to beef this kid up! Not working yet :(

*Is sleeping without the swaddle! This is HUGE for him. I thought he'd be swaddled on his honeymoon! He started bending around in his swaddle until he flipped and was stranded on his tummy, so we had to give it up cold turkey for a sleep sak. It took a while for him to learn to sleep with all of his limbs free, but he's doing great now! He wakes up twice between 7 pm- 7 am when he flips over and gets uncomfortable. 

*Sits up SO WELL. He has no interest in crawling or anything resembling crawling because he can lean over and around and everything and pull himself back up to sitting. He doesn't mind tummy time as much, though, since he started sleeping in the Sleep Sak. I think he's happier with the night practice of being mobile, he just doesn't care during the day :)
*After a full month of sitting up almost all day the rash under his neck has finally gone away!

*Sits in the toddler side of the baby bathtub (because we just realized there was a newborn and toddler side)

*Is spending a lot more time being happy! Wow. Finally. He is actually a LOT of fun to be around now! 

*Laughs and smiles more often. Most often when we kiss his tummy, roughhouse with him, when we laugh, or kiss under his chin. 

*Will sit while I read an entire children's book. We try to avoid any showing him any screens, so I'm reading a couple of books to him a day to stimulate his imagination. So I need some new books.

*Favorite new toys are stuffed animals. He's really interested in their softness and texture, and will snuggle in with one when he's awake. It's so cute... He met an actual dog that let him touch his fur and Whit was so excited! He laughed immediately as if thinking, "Wow! This stuffed animal moves!" 

*Puts everything in his mouth. EVERYTHING. Thankfully my mom gave him some Little People toys, which are the perfect size for him to hold and chew on. I think we'll be getting some more of those. 

*Rolls over from tummy to back and back to tummy. Not enough to move around that way, but seems proud of himself for doing it :) 

*Starting to mimmick our speech. He makes the CUTEST noises. We love having "conversations" with him, where we just mimick noises back and forth!

*Has amazing concentration. He has always seemed to, and it hasn't stopped. Most recently he will watch Ben opperate a remote control helicopter until the battery runs out. He doesn't even notice if he's on his tummy or sitting up... he just watches it with his mouth open for as long as Ben flies it! I think that's why he doesn't care about moving. He doesn't mind sitting up even if no toys are around, he just likes to watch and observe everything around him. 

Whit's 7 month photo shoot was during Ben's lunch break, so I got some cute ones of the two of them! Before my camera made a weird noise then turned off (aka the battery died...)

It's obvious Whit adores Ben, isn't it? 

Our conversations lately have been different versions of "He's so great, isn't he?" "Oh yeah, SO great..." "I love him SO much... Don't you just love him so much?" "Oh... SO MUCH..." Haha! :D 

But honestly, he is growing up, showing his personality, and is getting to be more and more fun to be around. Gosh, we just love him. He is our entire world. Oh. My. Goodness.