Thursday, April 15, 2010

Skip this if you hate sentimentality

So I'm feeling sort of strange about so many recent posts just describing my wonderful relationship, but I can't help it. This is the stuff dreams are made of! So if you're the type to walk away from a good Disney princess movie, you may want to just re-read the thoughtful post about pollen and longboarding.

So Tuesday afternoon I talked to two different unmarried girl friends.  One is engaged and told me that she still talks to her ex-boyfriend; constantly needing to remind him that he didn't "win" her because he hurt her so many times. The other friend has been dating someone off and on, and was upset because he just doesn't show the same emotion and is sort of stringing her along. Both friends reminded me of relationships I've been in, too, and I kept saying to them,  "You'll find your BEN." meaning that I went through some rough ones and am now married to a man who treats me like gold. Because of those conversations I was thinking about how Ben treats me and shows his love for me throughout the day. I love these commonplace examples :)

(Or at least that's my interpretation. If yours is different, keep it to yourself.)

Story 1: Let Me Explain, Officer... 
We always go to the temple on Tuesday nights. Ben and I each drive there from work, so we meet at the interstate and leave one car in a nearby parking lot to carpool to the temple.  This Tuesday we were both really tired by the end of the work day, and I also had a really bad headache. Ben told me he was waiting for me at the shady end of a Days Inn hotel, and that he would probably be taking a nap. He was. I pulled up beside his car, got out, opened his door, and crawled in beside him. I closed the door and we laid  down on his reclined chair for at least five minutes, each trying to just enjoy a peaceful moment. Was he comfortable? Absolutely not. Were people watching from their hotel rooms? Tons. Did Ben care? No. He let me interrupt his "nap" and stayed uncomfortable with me in the front seat. 

Story 2: He Talks in His Sleep?!
While we were at the temple I started to feel really sick. I was still exhausted and my headache had multiplied to a stomachache, too. I kept thinking that I would pass out, or that I must look so bad that someone would tell me to go home. Don't worry, neither happened. We got home around 8:30, and without saying a word I changed to my pajamas and crawled into bed. Ben brought me some Tylenol and a glass of water, and I was already so out of it that all I can remember of it was telling him I wanted two pills instead of one (don't judge.) Yes, I actually fell right asleep at 8:30 pm! 
I woke up at 1:05 am, though, because MY HUSBAND (who had come to bed a couple hours earlier) sat bolt upright in bed and, while still sleeping, said, "Is there anything you need? I'll get it for you!" I thought about joking with his mostly-asleep self and saying something like, "I need a kidney... I haven't told you yet..." but he was just so sweet I couldn't even joke. He continued to wake me up by telling me that he loved me throughout the night. 
(I have a theory that you don't really know a person until you've observed them asleep. You are your truest form of self asleep. Think about it: you have no real control over what you're doing or saying, yet you do it anyway. That makes those actions instinctual. Ben was instinctually telling me that, in his core, he was thinking about me, concerned about me, and loved me. But that just one social scientist's opinion.)

Story 2: The Lock
I woke up with Ben to his alarm at 6:45 am, but we had so much fun joking about last night that he didn't leave for work until 7:30. That is L-A-T-E for Ben and his  45 minute commute! Nevertheless, after complaining about the time I heard Ben turn his key in the door lock after leaving the apartment. It means so much to me that, despite already being really late, Ben took some extra time to keep me safe in the apartment before running down to the car. Its the sort of thing I hope I still recognize as love years from now when the baby is crying and I wake up to a dirty house and husband leaving for work. 

And, believe it or not, I'm still tired. But my headache is gone!

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